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Pessaries: Has Your Doctor Convinced You to Give Up?
"I tried it, and it didn't work."
I've heard this a lot about various health approaches. But much of the time, whatever "it" is didn't work because it wasn't being done in a way that would work.
People conclude that something didn't work, but they don't know what they don't know.
“I tried kegels, but they didn't work for me.”
That's a popular one! Because in order to be therapeutic, kegels must be done in a very specific way, and 99.99% of women who 'try' kegels are not doing kegels correctly.
"A pessary didn't work for me."
This is common. I hear this a lot.
But do you know what else I hear a lot? Other women responding, saying "My first pessary didn't work for me either, but I kept trying, and now I have one that is working great, and it's changed my life."
It's not unusual for women to try six or eight pessaries before they find the one that works.
This is typical:
Pessary #1 doesn't work out.
Doctor: "I guess a pessary doesn't work for you."
At this point, many women conclude, "I guess a pessary doesn't work for me."
But if you have tried only one pessary, there are many, many pessaries you haven't tried.
And there may be other aspects of pessary care you can improve to help a pessary work for you. Using different approaches to improve the health of the vaginal lining is important for many women (and vaginal estrogen is not the only way). Optimizing your pelvic floor, as we do in the Kegel Queen Program, can help a pessary fit better, or help it stay in position.
I have worked with women who have truly tried everything and still struggle to wear a pessary safely, comfortably, and effectively. But nearly always, when a woman says, "a pessary didn't work for me," there is more that can be done. With pessaries, the most common problem is simply that the care provider has given up, and convinced you to give up too.
Keep asking, keep trying, until you get what you need.
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