Having a baby can really mess up your sex life.
You’re desperate for sleep. The minute you get in the mood, the baby cries. And after you’ve spent the entire day cuddling and breastfeeding, the last thing you want is to be touched even more.
Having our wonderful daughter was the best thing that ever happened to me and my husband, but parenthood was really tough on our sex life. And it wasn’t about being tired or getting interrupted. For us, there was a devastating secret that was far worse…
Before I was a mom, in the early days of our relationship, sex was awesome. We took a month-long vacation to Bali. It’s one of the most beautiful places on Earth, but we barely saw anything on the island because we couldn’t drag ourselves away from the bedroom long enough. We’d go out and find a restaurant when we got too hungry — then go straight back to our room for some more quality time.
Back at home, we had other responsibilities… though sex was always a really important part of our relationship, and it was fantastic.
Then we had our baby, and everything changed.
Literally, physically, sex didn’t feel the same. Pregnancy and birth had changed me, so I didn’t have the sensation I used to have. There was no intensity. I just couldn’t feel him the way I used to. I didn’t like it, but I figured there was nothing I could do about it — I thought it was just the price I paid for being a mom.
This was bad.
But when he told me sex didn’t feel that great to him anymore either, I was devastated.
I felt like less of a woman. It really rattled my confidence in myself. And I felt guilty, as if I were giving him something second-rate. I was scared to admit, even to myself, how bad the problem was. Would he end up leaving me? Or stay, and never be satisfied?
And this might be the worst part: I felt utterly and completely alone. I thought I was the only woman on the planet to have this problem. I was so scared and ashamed that I didn’t talk about it to anybody. Not my sisters, not my girlfriends, not anyone.
It wasn’t until years later — when, as the Kegel Queen, I started hearing from zillions of women all about the intimate details of their sex lives — that I figured out this exact problem is happening to women all the time!
The good news?
Good news #1: Kegel exercises can solve this problem, when you do kegels right. In fact, of all the problems kegels can solve, this is the one kegels can solve most reliably.
Good news #2: Kegels worked for me! I was determined to solve this problem (and other post-baby health problems “down there”), so I did a ton of research to find out exactly how to do kegels that really work. After just two months of real kegels, hubby and I got our groove back… bigtime. Sex actually got even better than it was before baby.
It’s all because of kegel exercises — but not just any kegel exercises. Most women are doing kegels completely wrong, even if they learned how from a doctor, midwife, or childbirth teacher. Real kegels that really work are the only kegels that can make your pelvic floor happy, and make you happy too.